Tuesday, October 31, 2023

Personal Hell: The Sacred Iconography of Jacob’s Ladder - The American Society of Cinematographers

https://theasc.com/articles/personal-hell-the-sacred-iconography-of-jacobs-ladder

Jacob’s Ladder opens on a hazy, humid evening in Vietnam’s Mekong Delta, 1971. A platoon of U.S. Army soldiers linger in the shade of canvas tents and grass roof huts, smoking, swatting at flies, napping, passing their time in purgatory with grass and childish jokes. Among them is Jacob Singer (Tim Robbins), a private first class his comrades call “Professor” on account of college degrees.

Along with their dog tags, some of the soldiers wear pendants around their neck: a peace symbol, a Star of David, a lucky horseshoe. Jacob's necklace bears the symbol for ahimsa, the Jain Dharma principle of nonviolence.

In any other film, these details could be considered minor references, but here they are just a few of the many instances in which Jacob’s Ladder uses sacred imagery to tell the story of a broken man desperately clinging to the shattered fragments of his past life.

Without warning, the camp is attacked by an unknown enemy. All hell breaks loose. Some of the soldiers begin to convulse and shake as fire and brimstone rain from the sky. Men are eviscerated and dismembered.

Jacob escapes into the jungle. In a POV shot, he’s ambushed and bayonetted in the gut by an unseen attacker. He falls to the ground, and with a match cut, awakens on a New York City subway train three years later. He’d fallen asleep reading a paperback copy of Albert Camus’s existentialist novella The Stranger and missed his stop. His right hand rests on his abdomen, where he'd been stabbed.

Jacob steps off the train and finds that the exit from his platform is locked, so he must cross over to the other side to get out. As he steps onto the tracks, another train suddenly barrels toward him. He dives out of its way, catching a glimpse of ghostly faces through the windows as it roars by.

Jacob is now a veteran and a postal worker, living in a cozy Brooklyn apartment with his girlfriend Jezebel (Elizabeth Peña). It's revealed that prior to the war, he’d been a doctor, married to another woman, Sarah (Patricia Kalember), and the father of three children, one of whom, Gabe (Macaulay Culkin), was killed in a tragic auto accident.

The majority of the film’s directly religious references are tied to Judeo-Christian beliefs. (The title itself is a nod to the vision of Old Testament patriarch Jacob, who saw a ladder leading from the earth up to heaven.) Jacob and Jezzie’s apartment is a veritable reliquary of spiritual objects d'art: a Christian cross, crossed again with a pair of swords hangs on the wall next to the window. A replica of Hugo Rheinhold’s Ape with Skull is perched on Jacob’s desk, the open book at the primate's feet inscribed with the words "Eritis sicut Deus..." which translates to "You will be like God..." The rest of the page is ripped away, omitting the last part of the sentence "...scientes bonum et malum." Knowing good and evil.

Prayer beads are draped over the shelf on the headboard, next to a candlestick base in the image of Auguste Rodin’s The Thinker (originally conceived as a likeness of poet Dante Alighieri in the sculptor’s masterwork, The Gates of Hell).

Next to the bed is a shelf lined with books like Savage God and The Magical Philosophy, while elsewhere in the apartment A Witches Bible Volume I: The Sabbats, Demonology, The Roots of Evil and Dante's The Divine Comedy are interspersed with academic texts on sociology and psychology.

These objects provide insight into the psyche and soul of a man concerned with the origins of human nature, and it’s this curiosity that drives him to investigate the relationship between his demonic visions and the revelation that he and his platoon were the subjects of a military psy-op gone wrong.

The filmmakers use several effective techniques to break down the barriers of Jacob’s reality, in particular, editor Tom Rolf’s jump/smash/match cuts between Jacob’s medevac in Vietnam, his horrific visions and his post-war life in New York City.

Many of the demons are portrayed as half-human ghouls with obscured and contorted faces, horns and leathery appendages protruding through broken skin, though some all-out monsters do appear. Makeup effects were supplied by J. Gordon Smith's Toronto-based FxSmith company. The demons' vibrating effect was achieved by under-cranking the camera to 4 fps for playback at 24 fps.

"All through the movies you're dealing with demons and angels and hell and heaven, and I spent a year, maybe more, trying to wrestle with how to do it — how to do a devil with horns and not make people laugh," said Lyne in a contemporaneous interview (Cinefantastique, Dec '90). "I tried to make it all human-based — sort of thalidomidey — fleshy, horns from the bone, a tail that looks a little like a schlong. I didn't want these things easily dismissed as too familiar. I did a lot of shaking, vibrating, tortured things."

Religious symbolism is woven so throughly into the tapestry of the film's narrative that one begins to recognize familiar images where they were perhaps not intended, such as the scene were Jacob goes into shock after witnessing a vision of Jezzie and a demon. His temperature skyrockets, and Jezzie rallies the help of two neighbors to lift Jacob into a bathtub full of ice water.

The camera is tight on Jacob's flushed, passionate expression. His head lolls to one shoulder. His outstretched arms are supported by the neighbors as Jezzie looms anxiously in the backround. When they lift him into the tub their arms fully encircle his body, the way Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus lower the body of Christ down from the cross in the popular Christian motif. (A similar mood is struck in Caravaggio's The Entombment of Christ.)

Jacob's only solace is in his visits with Louis (Danny Aiello), the smiling, rotund chiropractor whom Jacob describes as an “overgrown cherub.” Louis's office is a sanctuary filled with soft white light streaming in through a set of bay windows and Tiffany stained glass.

Jacob's inquiries into the possibility that he and the other soldiers were unwilling test subjects in a murderous wargame gets the attention of U.S. Government agents, who ambush and threaten him. Jacob escapes capture by throwing himself from their moving vehicle, but severely injures his back. He's taken to a hospital, the bowels of which is populated with a host of tortured souls.

"I tried to use images from Francis Bacon — tortured, blurred shots, red streaks and sharp pieces which, when you freeze frame this stuff, looks just like Bacon's drawings," said Lyne (Cinefantastique, Dec '90).

Jacob is strapped to a reclining operating table and his head is screwed into a medical halo. The operating lamp bathes him with light, which reflects off his body and onto the attending doctors lurking at the edge of darkness in a macabre twist on Rembrandt's The Anatomy Lesson of Dr. Nicolaes Tulp. Jezzie, in a surgical gown, preps a wicked-looking syringe then hands it to an eyeless demon, who plunges the giant needle into the middle of Jacob’s forehead in an attempt to purge his memories and ultimately, his will to live.

Cinematographer Jeffrey L. Kimball, ASC's striking photography possesses the tones and textures of a Renaissance-era painting. Optically, the film has a deep-focus quality, with atmospheric perspective used to achieve a sense of depth by contrasting dark foregrounds and light backgrounds filled with steam, haze and smoke.

Additionally, light is diffused at the source, creating a sfumato effect through which tones and colors gradually shade together to produce soft outlines and hazy forms.

Chiaroscuro lighting enhances textural qualities with deep shadows.

Jacob awakes in the hospital, doped up and in traction, unsure of what he's experiencing is real or a dream. Louis storms in, all righteous fury. Untangling Jacob from his harnesses, he cries “Why don’t you just burn him at the stake?” Louis transfers him from the hospital bed to a wheelchair and whisks him back to the safety of his office. “I was in hell,” Jacob murmurs. “I don’t want to die."

Louis cracks a knowing smile. “Eckhart saw hell, too,” he says, referring to the thirteenth century German Catholic theologian, philosopher and mystic. “The way he sees it, if you’re frightened of dying and you’re holding on, you’ll see devils tearing your life away. But if you’ve made your peace, the devils are really angels freeing you from the earth. It’s just a matter of how you look at it.”

Carl G. Jung — a Swiss psychiatrist whose ideas the filmmakers (and Jacob) are almost certainly aware of — writes in his 1964 essay Approaching the Unconscious that symbols point to something working deep in the human unconscious to conjure the vast, significant mysteries of existence. When signs, like an effigy or image of the human body, are imbued with mystery, they become symbols because they now stand for something beyond the object itself, though their true meaning remains elusive and subjective.

Back at the apartment, Jacob sorts through the contents of an old cigar box, a personal collection of sacred objects he's held on to over the years: honorable discharge papers, a Master of Arts degree from Brooklyn College, dogtags (the religious preference is Jewish) and a letter from Gabe.

In one of the film's most visually and thematically darkest scenes, Jacob meets with Michael (Matt Craven), a former chemist in the Army's "Ladder" program, who reveals the truth of what happened on the day Jacob's platoon was attacked: in a drug-induced craze, the soldiers turned against each other, their lives sacrificed on the altar of war.

Thus enlightened, Jacob gives a taxicab driver all the money in his pocket to take him "home," back to the apartment he once shared with Sarah. Rosary beads jangle on the dashboard as the cab cuts through the dense night fog like Charon on the River Styx.

A doorman at wrought iron gates welcomes Jacob as an old friend or St. Peter might. Past halls of white marble and crown molding, Jacob finds tableaus of unfinished homework and half-eaten dessert, a life in framed photographs on the piano.

Jacob sits on the couch in quiet contemplation as rain falls outside and a sharp blue light cuts into the room from a low angle. In a montage set to a slowly beating heart, the most significant memories of Jacob's life come flooding back in grainy 16mm.

The heartbeat stops. The rain has ended. Jacob awakens and finds Gabe sitting on the steps, bathed in heavenly morning light. The little boy takes his father by the hand and leads him upstairs, and the image dips to white.

We are back in Vietnam. Having succumbed to his injuries, Jacob lies dead on a stretcher in a field hospital, his prone body still enough to have been carved from stone, with the faint hint of a smile upon his face. “He looks kind of peaceful,” says a medic as he removes one of Jacob’s dog tags.

Religion uses iconography to tell stories of life, death and redemption where traditional language is insufficient and personal experience with a system of belief isn't required. Symbols are necessarily universal as well as mysterious, and only when coupled with a text or image or transferred to a personal object or sign do they become specific. Jacob's Ladder inverts this formula by taking the universal experience of dying — in a narrative lifted from The Tibetan Book of the Dead — and using specific symbols to imbue it with a deeper, more personal meaning.

‘Stan Lee’ Documentary Slammed by Jack Kirby’s Son: ‘Are We to Assume Lee Had a Hand in Creating Every Marvel Character?’

https://variety.com/2023/film/news/stan-lee-documentary-slammed-jack-kirby-son-1235648062/

Neal Kirby, son of the seminal Marvel Comics artist and writer Jack Kirby, has shared a statement expressing his distaste with Disney+’s new documentary spotlighting the life of Stan Lee.

Credited as one of the leading creators of Marvel Comics, Lee’s life and legacy are given a detailed exploration through the doc, which premiered on the streamer on June 16. Kirby released a skeptical statement about the film through the Twitter account of his daughter, Jillian Kirby.

“It should be noted and is generally accepted that Stan Lee had a limited knowledge of history, mythology, or science,” Kirby wrote. “On the other hand, my father’s knowledge of these subjects, to which I and many others can personally attest, was extensive. Einstein summed it up better; ‘More the knowledge, lesser the ego. Lesser the knowledge, more the ego.’”

Kirby’s lengthy denouncement continues by calling into question Lee’s involvement in the creation of many Marvel characters in the early-to-mid 1960s. “You will see Lee’s name as a co-creator on every character, with the exception of the Silver Surfer, solely created by my father. Are we to assume Lee had a hand in creating every Marvel character? Are we to assume that it was never the other co-creator that walked into Lee’s office and said, ‘Stan, I have a great idea for a character!’ According to Lee, it was always his idea.”

Kirby also highlights that Lee took major credit for creating the Fantastic Four “with only one fleeting reference” to his father. He also claims that the Fantastic Four was initially created by Jack for DC in the “Challengers of the Unknown” comic. Kirby goes on by stating that Ben Grimm (The Thing) was named after his father’s real name, Benjamin, and Sue Storm was named after his daughter, Susan.

Sunday, October 29, 2023

Cupid Untying The Zone of Venus (1784) and Portrait Of Miss Jacobs (1762) by Joshua Reynolds.




The Sony PlayStation 2 - Review - Game Sack

Episode 165 - We're back and we bring you an overview of the PS2 and some of it's games. This is not a greatest hits compilation. What are some of your favorite PS2 games? What does the system mean to you?

Friday, October 27, 2023

The Zack Snyder Video


What are autistic shutdowns and why do they happen? - Bristol Autism Support

https://www.bristolautismsupport.org/autism-autistic-shutdowns/

When everything around us becomes a bit too much to handle, we all have ways of reacting to it. Some of us try to bottle up our feelings, whilst a few people’s first instinct would be to go somewhere quiet. For autistic children (and adults) who become overloaded, anxious or unable to cope with what’s going on around them, there tends to be one of two reactions.

One is going into a meltdown. They vary widely from person to person, but they generally develop as a result of anxiety reaching a point where it cannot be contained. Shouting, screaming and ranting can occur. With some people, meltdowns also have a physical side; throwing, kicking and lashing out often happen.

The other reaction to overload is a shutdown. They aren’t nearly as easy to spot as a meltdown, but the impact on an autistic person can be just as big. In this post, we explore what a shutdown actually is, how it happens and what you can do to help someone experiencing one.

The silent treatment

Shutdowns are a more muted response to extreme overload or stress. When an autistic person goes into shutdown mode, there are a few common signs. These are:

- Being completely silent
- Not being able to communicate in any way
- Withdrawing to a quiet, dark space to get away from the cause of their shutdown
- Not being able to move from where they are because they’re thinking too much about the cause of their shutdown
- Lying down on a flat surface, being completely still

It’s not that easy to tell when a shutdown is going to happen, but if your autistic son or daughter is feeling stressed or overwhelmed, it’s good to know what the root cause is. They may be in a crowded, noisy environment. They may be doing a task they find really difficult or may be on the brink of shutdown as a result of days and weeks of stress building up.

Shutdowns have two purposes. The first is to try and express that someone is feeling stressed, while the second is to try and get rid of that stress and calm down. In some instances, they occur after a meltdown, acting as a means of trying to return to normal.

Time to recover

As is the case with some meltdowns, an autistic person who experiences a shutdown will eventually come round. However, the time taken to recover varies depending on the shutdown’s cause, how overwhelmed the person is and how close they are to its cause.

To be on the safe side, it’s worth giving your child space when it happens. By being left alone for a while, they’ll be able to gradually de-stress and, in the process, be able to recover without it seeming forced or risking another shutdown occurring.

If your child has several shutdowns, take the time to find out what works to help them recover. It could be something they enjoy, something to stim with or a quiet, reassuring word or touch. The latter can work in knowing that your son or daughter has some support when at their most stressed or anxious.

Shut everything out

When your child has a shutdown, find out what’s causing it. When they’re in shutdown mode somewhere busy like, say, a supermarket or a shopping centre, it’s worth leaving that space as soon as possible. If it’s happening at home, turn off whatever’s making the sounds or causing a shutdown and let your child spend some quiet time alone.

If shutdowns happen at school, inform the headteacher or whoever else is responsible of what they are, why they happen and how they affect your child. Then, the school will be able to make reasonable adjustments for your child. More importantly, they will also know how to make sure they’re supported when needed the most.

There are a few other ways in which you can help your. One is putting together a “worry book”, which lists everything your child is stressed or anxious about. At home, soundproofing their bedroom can work, while outside, trying to avoid busy environments where possible can work wonders.

It’s important to know that shutdowns can be helpful to autistic people. While they can take a few minutes or hours to recover from, they help to block out stresses and strains. Do what you can to help and they’ll feel better for it.

Saturday, October 21, 2023

BOOK REVIEW: Moonwar, by Ben Bova

https://atboundarysedge.com/2022/07/02/book-review-moonwar-by-ben-bova/

Moonbase. The future of humanity, or a waste of time and resources? An increasingly anti-technology United Nations is determined to see Moonbase brought to heel. But Douglas Stavenger is determined to see his father’s legacy succeed. Even if it means declaring independence . . .

Well, Ben Bova has done it again. Though its pre-2022 publication date renders it invalid for the Boundy Awards, Moonwar is a strong contender for my favourite book of the year. It has all the hallmarks of Bova’s Grand Tour, from a dedication to rigorous science to a diverse group of characters. What it lacks is the usual serene pacing that I’ve come to associate with the Grand Tour. This is not a bad thing, by the way. In fact, it’s the greatest strength. Because while most of this series has been focused on humanity versus environment in tales of exploration in far-flung frontiers, this one is about people versus people. It’s a thriller with both military and political elements. It’s also got some of the best pacing I have ever read.

Moonwar is split into three acts. The first is a countdown to the UN invasion of the Moon, told across chapters labelled with how many hours remain until the hostile troops’ arrival. Despite the length of the journey from Earth to the Moon, this is a fantastically tense section of the book. With a sword of Damocles hanging over their heads, we get to see how the varied personnel of Moonbase react to the coming war. There are a lot of characters here, and not all of them have a lot to do. But that’s just the point. Stavenger’s rebellion goes beyond any one man, even the corrupt leader of the UN. The future being fought is not only that of Moonbase, but of humanity as a whole.

The middle act is told across the span of several weeks. Here, the difference in a lunar day and a terrestrial day is important to remember, because the Moon turns far more slowly than the Earth. Over the course of these terrestrial days, we see the slow build-up of forces on each side, even as the Moonbase crew remain steadfast in their non-military resistance. The more drawn-out nature of the middle act also allows for a return to diplomacy, and I dare say that Bova can make boardroom meetings more interesting than any other author I’ve read. Certainly there’s no one else who could so deftly balance the action sequences on the Moon with the dialogue taking place back on Earth.

Bova’s versatility as an author aside, this still bears the mark of what I like to see in science fiction. Particularly in hard SF, I like to see science and intellect triumphing. The regressive nature of certain Earthbound groups is clearly a danger to humanity’s long-term viability. And while Bova will be the first to acknowledge that technology can be put to less than savoury purpose, science in itself is never the enemy. That, to me, is the moral heart of the Grand Tour. We don’t know what’s out there. But the only way we can thrive, is by asking questions, and looking for answers.

A simply phenomenal book, Moonwar cements Ben Bova’s place as one of my favourite authors, and ensures I’ll be reading as many of his books as I can lay my hands on.

Patriotic Teen Fails Spanish

Jean Anne Whorton goes Beyond The Facts, talking to the high school sophomore who has become a conservative hero for refusing to learn his Spanish vocabulary.

Thursday, October 19, 2023

If You Liked Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, You’ll Love Lewis Carroll’s Wonderful Photos

https://slate.com/culture/2015/09/charles-lutwidge-dodgsons-photographs-are-collected-in-the-photographs-of-lewis-carroll-a-catalogue-raisonne.html

Lewis Carroll is known for his beloved classic Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, but fewer people know Charles Lutwidge Dodgson’s—Carroll’s real name—other great contribution to the arts: photography. In his book The Photographs of Lewis Carroll: A Catalogue Raisonné, which the University of Texas Press published in August, Carollian scholar Edward Wakeling corrects that. For the first time, it collects all of Dodgson’s known photographs in one place.

Dodgson was a perfectionist in all of his pursuits, so when he first took an interest in photography he became determined to master it. He acquired a folding Ottewill camera, learned the wet collodion process, and studied the work of other artists. In photography, as well as in writing, Dodgson valued simplicity. He wanted viewers to concentrate on his subject’s face, not the background. As a result, he avoided the extraneous furniture, draped curtains, and vases of his peers. Instead, he mostly used a plain blanket or a wall for a backdrop.

“This is mirrored in Dodgson’s writing. His use of language is straightforward—there are no long descriptive passages in the Alice books. In the main his style is narrative. He tells a story,” said Wakeling.

Like many Victorian photographers, Dodgson took a range of images, but his main focus was portraiture, and his special talent was making his sitters look natural and comfortable. Exposure times could be as long as 45 seconds back then, and sitters had to remain perfectly still to avoid motion blur. This made photographing children particularly challenging, since they are not patient sitters. But Dodgson kept them engaged by telling them stories. Among his subjects was Alice Liddell, the girl who inspired his heroine in the Alice books.

“He was a born storyteller. They would listen intently and he would capture the moment. He made the experience of being photographed as enjoyable as possible, as some of his sitters recorded afterward,” Wakeling said.

Dodgson’s diaries recorded virtually all his photographic activity, but his register of photographs is now missing. Over 20 years, Wakeling has done his best to reconstruct it. He searched the collections at Princeton University and the University of Texas at Austin during month-long research fellowships. He spent time at Christ Church in Oxford, England, and the National Portrait Gallery in London to look through albums. The Dodgson family showed him photographs and gave him information about photographs that had been sold; he also contacted private collectors through the Lewis Carroll Society, searched auction records and collected books on Victorian photography. Gradually, he assembled a database of all known images.

Carroll stopped taking photographs in 1880 in order to focus on writing and other academic pursuits. But his decades in photography were quite productive. He took 3,000 photographs; of these, nearly 1,000 have survived.

“There are still photographs that have not yet come to light; I hope this book will result in some appearing that we haven’t yet seen. Family archives and attics need to be searched. I am sure there will be many people who have not appreciated that the writer of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland was also an important early photographer.”

i'm autistic! (being diagnosed with autism at 23)

hi everyone! thanks for watching this video!

there's soooooo much i didn't say (because i forgot lol even with notes) so if anyone is curious about anything at all, feel free to ask!

also you guys wouldn't BELIEVE how many "um"s i had to edit out of this video. like it's crazy.

Wednesday, October 18, 2023

Just finished watching A Clockwork Orange (1971) and Off Your Rocker (1982)...









Daily life tips and recommendations for a person with autism

I recently realized that some of the people that follow my blog are autistic. Well, this isn't surprising because a certain percentage of the population (about 0.5%) are intelligent autistics, and many of them are active on the internet because using the internet is one of those activities that don't require face to face interaction with people. Therefore, I think that I will provide some advice for autistics, and for people in general, that can help them in daily life. I'm doing this mostly for myself, however, in order not to forget about these tips. I've been able to accumulate a few decades of life experience already due to my age. One thing that I would recommend for autistic people is to take a pause and relax your body when you're around people and when you're feeling nervous. Autistic people are often in a state of tension. Because of this, their bodies are in a condition of tension, and they make rapid, jerky, or unusual movements that normal (neurotypical) people find strange and even repulsive. I know that being relaxed isn't something that comes easy for an autistic (neurodivergent) person, but this helps to appear normal around people, to make proper eye contact, to make decisions better, and to avoid outbursts. Getting into a state of relaxation also helps an autistic person to retain that much needed energy, which can be easily lost when an autistic person is around people. Staying relaxed and keeping my body relaxed is something that I forgot about for a while, but, fortunately, I remembered about this recently. I don't mean that an autistic person should always be relaxed, but being relaxed can often help in social situations. Of course, there's another, much more simple, way to relieve tension for an autistic person. This method is stimming with a so-called stim toy. Using a stim toy is a much easier way of relaxing than attempting to relax your body consciously. This is something that I found out about very recently. But I decided to use a pen instead of a stim toy. I bought a pen with a cap that opens and closes. I take this pen everywhere with me now, and I stim by opening and closing the cap of this pen, by turning the cap, or by simply holding this pen in one of my hands. A pen is one of the most common things that a person can carry, and one can even take it to a job interview. I think that if I had used a pen or some stim toy to stim since my childhood, my life would have been a lot better. When I use my pen to stim, I cease to be nervous, I gain confidence, I can focus better, I can appear normal around people, I can make better eye contact, and I cease to worry. Another thing that helps me to get through a tough day is aspirin. For some reason, aspirin helps me to feel better and more confident. If I'm nervous, if I'm feeling down, or if I have a headache, I take one aspirin tablet a day, but not more than one tablet a day. The stronger the aspirin, the better the effect that it has. It's definitely not a good thing to consume a lot of aspirin because, like any drug, it's not really a good thing for a person's stomach and digestive system. Therefore, I try not to consume aspirin every day. But, when I need to feel better or when I'm in an important social situation, aspirin definitely helps. Another thing that some autistic people do when they go outside is wear sunglasses. They do this even when it's not sunny outside. Sunglasses cover their eyes, thus making them less nervous and less noticeable to the people around them. Wearing sunglasses is not something that I'm in the habit of doing, but many autistics find this to be very helpful. I already mentioned in one of my posts that I prefer to sleep for at least 10 hours per day. This is probably one of the things that keep me looking very young and healthy for my age. I also don't smoke or drink alcohol. It's obvious that the more a person sleeps, the better a person feels during the day. Some people say that they like to sleep as little as possible in order to get more things done, but I think that this is a mistake. I think that sleeping less affects a person's health, well-being, and life expectancy. Therefore, I try to get as much sleep as I can. Since I learned that I have autism at the end of July of this year, I've been trying to find out as much useful information as I can about this condition. I haven't been obsessed with autism, and I learned pretty much everything that I needed to know about it in the first 3 or 4 weeks after finding out about it, but I recently came across more information that I found to be of some use. One thing that I've been doing sometimes is watching videos by autistic people on YouTube. I watch videos that are only by autistic women because I don't really want to watch autistic men talk about their experiences. Moreover, almost all of the videos that I've been able to find about autism on YouTube are by autistic women. It seems that autistic women are a lot more willing to talk about their experiences than autistic men. This is a good thing because I find their videos to be usually informative. Some researchers say that there are a lot more autistic men than autistic women, but I think that this might not be the case. Autistic women are better at hiding their autistic traits than autistic men, and they spend more time and effort on fitting in. This is why fewer of them get noticed or diagnosed. I try to avoid clickbait videos because I find clickbait videos to be unpleasant and often useless. Since monetization got introduced on YouTube some years ago, YouTube has become even worse than American television, in some ways. It's now a website that's filled with dumb and useless content because many people try to make only clickbait videos in order to make as much money as possible on YouTube. This is one of the reasons why I've been using YouTube less in the last several years. It's not surprising that there are clickbait videos about autism on YouTube because there are millions of autistic people around the world that would like to know more about their condition. Because of this, I've tried to watch videos about autism that are obscure and that don't have many views. Therefore, I try to avoid videos that are on channels that are dedicated to making videos about autism. Why I do this is simple. Clickbait videos are almost always a waste of time. Still, even with all of the negative changes that have taken place in the last decade or so on YouTube, YouTube remains the best website for watching videos. This is a downer, but such is reality now. YouTube is certainly better than Rutube, for example. In the last few years, the people running Rutube have deleted hundreds of my videos because they don't like some of my blog posts. Something that I noticed some time ago is that whenever I make a post that can be perceived as being critical of the Russian Federation, a dozen or more of my videos on Rutube get deleted at random. But there is a pattern. Since the Russian Federation is a right-wing state where real opposition figures, such as nationalists or socialists, have been getting killed by the authorities since the early-1990s, the first videos that got deleted on my channel were the few videos featuring such opposition figures. I didn't realize this at first, but this is now clear to me after I noticed that there's a pattern and after I read some comments by people. After that happened, almost all of the videos that have been getting deleted on my channel have been about sociology and history. I don't watch or read Russian propaganda, but, as one of my followers informed me, Russian propaganda does watch me closely. Another thing that I've done recently is read two of Michael Fitzgerald's books. These two books are titled 'Autism and Creativity: Is there a link between autism in men and exceptional ability?' (2004) and 'The Genesis of Artistic Creativity: Asperger's Syndrome and the Arts' (2005). These books aren't easy to obtain, but they can be bought online. I was able to buy them for a relatively low price in used condition, though they still cost me over $50. They might also be available in some libraries. I haven't finished reading these books yet, but the information that they contain has been very useful to me because Fitzgerald knows a lot about autism, specifically about Asperger syndrome. In 'The Genesis of Artistic Creativity', he selected 21 famous people (Jonathan Swift, Hans Christian Andersen, Herman Melville, Lewis Carroll, William Butler Yeats, Arthur Conan Doyle, George Orwell, Bruce Chatwin, Baruch Spinoza, Immanuel Kant, Simone Weil, Alfred Jules Ayer, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Ludwig van Beethoven, Erik Satie, Bela Bartok, Glenn Gould, Vincent van Gogh, Jack Butler Yeats, Laurence Stephen Lowry, and Andy Warhol) and explained why they had autism. When it comes to Carroll, Fitzgerald wrote, "He had 'a compulsive orderliness' and was systematic in his approach to organizing his work and activities. Undoubtedly a severe disciplinarian, he was 'a master of regulating his life, and superhuman in today's terms, in controlling his impulses during waking hours'." In his books, Fitzgerald states that people with Asperger syndrome are very creative and that they've been responsible for much of the progress that mankind has made. In one of his interviews, he said, "Well, Asperger syndrome has massive impact on all our lives. If we didn't have people with Asperger syndrome, we'd still be in the cave. We would not have developed technology. We would not have developed fire or the wheel. That's the first point. The second point is that the large group of genes in my view that give you Asperger syndrome also have a tendency to give you creativity of extreme proportions. Other people have the same view. So, there's an overlap between Asperger syndrome and creativity. And this has been known for thousands of years, at least what has been known is the link between genius akin to madness, for example. So, this kind of phenomenon has been observed as long as written records are there. Asperger syndrome was developed by a man in Austria. He worked on it throughout the 1930s, and he published on it. The first publication was in 1938 and later in 1944. It's a condition characterized by autistic features. People with Asperger syndrome have poor eye contact, they have problems reading non-verbal behavior, they have problems reading faces, they have problems with social know-how, they're naive and immature, they're emotionally immature, they're loners, they have problems sharing, they have problems turn-taking, they use repetitive language, and they have narrow interests and repetitive behavior. It's not surprising then that Asperger syndrome is associated with depression and anxiety. In later life, psychosis isn't rare. The perfect example of that is Isaac Newton, who is the greatest creator in the past thousand years. He developed a psychotic episode in later life, and he had all the features of classic Asperger syndrome. There's still a great deal of prejudice against persons with Asperger syndrome in the world. They suffer enormously. They suffer unnecessarily. They're often unfortunately bullied or ostracized, mistreated, maybe put in prison. Their condition isn't recognized." In 'Autism and Creativity', Fitzgerald wrote, "However, in order for the scientist to innovate, he must 'break the grip on his imagination that our powers of logical-seeming storytelling impose'. Creative people with HFA/ASP are obsessed with fundamental, bedrock discoveries. They have no interest in being merely replicative. Hence they have little regard for their contemporaries and do not conform to the values of society. They have a peculiar ability to become lost in the present, in the here-and-now, which appears to be a sine qua non for creativity of an HFA/ASP kind. Indeed, the HFA/ASP might facilitate this disconnectedness from the world so that creativity of pure genius can take place. High-functioning autism and Asperger's syndrome are pervasive developmental disorders and therefore different from mental disorders such as schizophrenia and manic-depressive psychosis. The differentiation between high-functioning autism and Asperger's syndrome has never been achieved scientifically, so I have retained the term HFA/ASP. The term, while cumbersome, does describe the scientific situation today. Indeed, Asperger's syndrome is often used as a synonym for high-functioning autism. It is possible to speculate that humankind would still be at the stage of development before the wheel was invented had it not been for the type of creativity that people with HFA/ASP developed. There is no doubt that HFA/ASP can also occur in females, and therefore a similar type of creativity should be (and is) possible. Nevertheless, to date there is no female equivalent of Newton, or no female equivalent in the mathematical/physical science domain."

One thing that I've noticed recently is that I like to often listen to soothing music or sounds and see films that I find calming. No doubt I do this because of my autism. Therefore, now I understand why The Ring (2002) is one of my favorite films. I think that I enjoy watching it even more than Jacob's Ladder (1990), A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987), Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988), The Hitcher (1986), and Halloween (1978), which are among my favorites too. Although The Ring is a supernatural horror film, it's not really that frightening, and I find its music and tone to be soothing. I would also add that, in my opinion, The Ring is one of the best films of the last two decades. It’s certainly one of the best horror films. For me, it has replay value. It also has an artistic touch, which is something that almost all of the films that got made since 2000 lack. When it comes to albums that are calming, I can mention some of the ones that I have in my collection. They include 2010: The Year We Make Contact by David Shire, Aja by Steely Dan, Avalon by Roxy Music, Beverly Hills Cop by Harold Faltermeyer, Bloodsport by Paul Hertzog, Body Heat by John Barry, C'est Chic by Chic, Creid by Yasunori Mitsuda, The Crow by Graeme Revell, Disintegration by The Cure, Everything by Climie Fisher, Black Rain by Hans Zimmer, Eye In The Sky by The Alan Parsons Project, Ghost In The Shell by Kenji Kawai, Halloween II by John Carpenter, Hats by The Blue Nile, The Hitcher by Mark Isham, Lethal Weapon by Michael Kamen, The Mack by Willie Hutch, The Yakuza by Dave Grusin, When Marnie Was There by Takatsugu Munamatsu, Three O’Clock High by Tangerine Dream, Thelma & Louise by Hans Zimmer, Starman by Jack Nitzsche, Risque by Chic, Return To Forever by Chick Corea, Rapture by Anita Baker, Rain Man by Hans Zimmer, Princess Mononoke by Joe Hisaishi, Spirited Away by Joe Hisaishi, Howl’s Moving Castle by Joe Hisaishi, Poltergeist II by Jerry Goldsmith, and On Her Majesty’s Secret Service by John Barry. Moreover, I can add that in The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild I've found another location where it's pleasing to stay, to look at the scenery, and to listen to the sounds. This location is called Keya Pond, which can be found in East Necluda. Since it hasn’t been easy for me to think of a picture that should be included in this post, I will just include a photograph of Seabreeze Walk and Beach Avenue in Downtown Vancouver. This avenue is where I sometimes like to take walks. It’s one of my favorite places in Vancouver. Another one of my favorite places in Vancouver is the section of British Columbia Highway 1A between Jervis Street and Bute Street.

Sunday, October 15, 2023

Abbas ibn Firnas: The Great Arab Aviation Pioneer, Scientist, and Inventor

https://www.arabamerica.com/abbas-ibn-firnas/

Throughout the history of mankind, there have been memorable people whose contribution to science is considered exceptional. We know the names of many of them, and in the context of aeronautics, the following illustrious names immediately come to mind. However, there are other names that have passed quietly into oblivion, despite the fact that their contribution has been truly remarkable. Such is the case of the scientist, historian, poet, inventor and, of course, aviation pioneer, Abbas Ibn Firnas. Many are surprised to learn that this man was the first to fly with an air-gliding machine, staying in flight for about ten minutes. He did this more than a thousand years before the Wright brothers, specifically in the year 875. Abbas ibn Firnas was the first person to ever operate a flying machine, or more like falling with style. His machine was not capable of lifting him in the air, but it did prevent him from directly falling into the ground.

Abbas Ibn Firnas

Born in the 9th century in Izn-Rand-Onda Al Andalus, which is present-day Ronda, Spain, he spent most of his adult life in the Emirate of Cordoba, one of the major learning hubs during the Umayyad Caliphate. Relatively little is known about his childhood, except that he acquired an extensive education and came to the fore in various disciplines, which led him inexorably to the city of Cordoba, which at that time was the richest and most influential in Al-Andalus. There he stood out as a scientist, inventor, poet, philosopher, alchemist, musician, and astrologer, to such an extent that he became known as Hakim Al-Andalus. Once in Cordoba, he went on to develop those facets of his knowledge that significantly contributed to the advancement of the sciences and the arts in the courts of the emirs Abderraman II and Muhammad I.

Some historical accounts suggest al Firnas was influenced by Armen Firman, who was neither a scientist nor a polymath but an astute observer of nature. It was Firman who first built wings made of wooden planks wrapped in silk and bird feathers. In the early 850s, Firman climbed to the top of the tallest mosque minaret in Qurtuba and jumped off wearing the wings. Although his attempt quickly failed and he plummeted to earth, the flying machine inflated just in time and slowed his descent. He was lucky enough not to break any bones in the fall; the delay of his landing proved somewhat life-saving. Ibn Firnas watched Firman’s adventure as he stood among the gathered, fascinated crowds who were all watching the skies above in amazement. Impressed with Firman’s result, Ibn Firnas began to realize that the act of flying in the air needed further investigation.

In Science

In the scientific field, he was the first in the Iberian Peninsula, and probably in Europe, to use the Sindhind astronomical tables, of Indian origin, which later would prove fundamental to the development of European science and would be studied in medieval universities as a Quadrivium subject. He introduced the Western world to the technique for carving rock crystals and even developed alchemical procedures to create crystals from different minerals. Also, he built an anaphoric clock, a complex mechanism that uses water as a liquid engine. The water flow is closed or opened by a series of valves and the clock serves to show the hour at any time of the day or night, something which was unusual at the time. He also developed the first armillary sphere in Europe, used to perform calculations and approximate astronomical observations, by moving the instrument’s rings according to the plane of the celestial rings.

As an example of his advanced knowledge of astronomy, he built a mechanically articulated planetarium at his residence in Cordoba which represented the celestial vault. He even provided it with sound and visual effects that simulated various weather phenomena: storms, lightning, and thunder. In the context of aerospace, Abbas Ibn Firnas is an extraordinary reference point as the creator of the precursor to the parachute and for being the first person to successfully design, build and test artifacts that remained in flight. He researched the mechanism behind airplanes 600 years before Leonardo da Vinci developed his designs for flying machines, and more than a thousand years before the Wright brothers made their famous flight.

Hezarfen Ahmed and the Wright Brothers

Hezarfen Ahmed Çelebi, who made experiments at home and researches various subjects, created a primitive form of today’s aircraft by copying another Turkish scientist, İsmail Cevheri. Before his historical flight, he made experiments in Istanbul to Okmeydanı to measure the durability level of the wings which he prepared by examining the birds’ flight. Later one morning, just in front of the eyes of Istanbul society gathered at the shores, he let himself go into the air, crossed the Bosporus by moving his wings, and landed on Üsküdar. In 1632, Hezarfen Ahmed Çelebi crossed the Bosporus with bird-like wings attached to his body on the southwest by jumping to the air from Galata Tower and landed on Doğancılar in Üsküdar, 3358 meters away. Hezarfen Çelebi was one of the most important people in Turkish aviation history.

The Wright brothers, Orville and Wilbur, were two American aviation pioneers generally credited with inventing, building, and flying the world’s the first successful motor-operated airplane. They made the first controlled, sustained flight of a powered, heavier-than-air aircraft with the Wright Flyer on December 17, 1903, 6 km south of Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. In 1905, the brothers developed their flying machine to make longer-running and more aerodynamic flights. The Wright brothers were also the first to invent aircraft controls that made the fixed-wing powered flight possible.

Nonetheless, Abbas ibn Firnas, a thousand years before the Wright brothers, designed a glider made of wool and silk, and he launched himself with it from the La Arruzafa hills, near Cordoba. He was so sure that his invention would work that he had convened hundreds of people to watch along the route. Also present were many members of the court of Muhammad I, Emir of the Andalusi caliphate. The result was a sustained flight using air currents, which lasted anything between two and ten minutes. Despite a difficult landing, he not only survived but also became the first man to fly with a heavier-than-air machine.

I Found Out I'm Autistic! | My Adult Autism Diagnosis Story | Autism in Women

Hey everyone, Today's video is a little bit different than usual. After finding out I'm autistic (what used to be called Asperger's syndrome is now part of the autism spectrum) in April, I discovered a lot about myself and decided to share this story with you. I talk about what autism can look like in women, my personal experience, and general knowledge about ASD (or ASC). Autism diagnosis is a very emotionally challenging process and as I share my own story, I also hope it can help someone else out, because it took me about a month of focused research to find out all of this information. Hope you enjoy, Irene

Friday, October 13, 2023

Now reading Michelangelo by Howard Hibbard...


Autism doesn't make me suffer, you do | Autism Acceptance Month 2020

First time ever I've tried out the autofocus on my camera and it's decided that my background is a lot more interesting than me... hence, making me slightly blurry for the entirety of this video, sorry! I deleted a thing from the end there to cover my butt, let me just suggest you google "autism speaks hategroup", thank you! I'll get a video on that topic done at some point as well! This is very much focussed on my personal experience and what I've read and heard from people in the communnity over the years. I am in no way an expert, but I do live this life. So take it as you will. And I definitely forgot to mention a thing or two, especially that it IS very important to learn coping mechanisms, like being able to deal with loud noises, like in a supermarket. However, the ways in which we deal with things like that is often deemed to be "wrong" by allistic people, because they see it as not socially acceptable (i.e. wearing headphones, going non-verbal and hence not being able to talk to anyone you may meet, etc). I'll also put this as a pinned comment, because let's be real, who really reads the video description. The term "Aspergers" is outdated, as well as "atypical autism", hence I'm using neither of those. The disorder has officially been, rightly so, grouped into one term in the DSM by now, making it "Autism Spectrum Disorder", or ASD. For the sake of simplicity I just said "Autism", I don't think that the "Spectrum Disorder" is that important to continuously add onto the end there :b

Saturday, October 7, 2023

Shadow of the Colossus’ controls are an exercise in art

https://www.destructoid.com/shadow-of-the-colossus-controls-are-an-exercise-in-art/

Artsy wonks like myself love to wax philosophic about the potential that games have in terms of narration or eliciting meaningful, emotional player responses. We laud innovative game designers for forcing us to make morally ambiguous choices about ourselves and the characters around us. Unfortunately, games fall short in one crucial, yet easily overlooked, way: they only go half of the distance.

What I mean to say is that while lots of the elements of the game are designed and featured in artistically and culturally relevant ways, a huge part of games is left out of the artistic amalgam: the controls. The controller is the fundamental aspect of videogames as a medium, yet developers and fans alike seem to totally overlook it. Unless the control schema is laughably bad or unnecessarily confusing, it gets nary a mention.

Even worse, the control scheme is almost exclusively relegated to a basic function and fails to convey any sense of artistry or contribute to an overarching metaphor. I’m not talking about good, responsive controls, or button mapping that is particularly intuitive; I mean a control scheme that, in and of itself, has something artistically important to say.

Fumito Ueda’s Shadow of the Colossus does just that.

It’s hard to appreciate just how creative the control scheme for Shadow of the Colossus is — particularly in the way it achieves an artistic goal — without comparing it to other games. To simplify, ponder this question: How does mapping “jump” to the X button contribute to the overarching theme of a game? Well, by and large, it doesn’t, and that’s fine.

However, I want to argue that Wander and Agro’s controls contribute in some important way to the artistry of Shadow of the Colossus.

Take the grabbing mechanic, for example. In order for Wander to grab onto things — ledges, walls, colossi — the player must hold down the R1 button. The distinction is subtle: you don’t just push R1, you have to hold it. The physical associations between holding onto a ledge and holding down the R1 button allow the player to always have a connection with Wander.

Similarly, to attack a colossus, the player must press the O button once to raise his sword, and O again to strike. Again, the player is never separated from Wander and controls all his physical actions. That is to say there is never a rift between what’s happening on-screen and what’s happening in your hand.

Compare this to a game like, say, God of War — you press X once, and you’ve killed 8 skeletons, deflowered a virgin, and ransacked a city — and you realize what a feat Ueda’s accomplished. The blurring of the line between Wander and the player becomes particularly important with respect to the titular colossi. Unlike God of War, killing your enemies is far from automatic or easy — it’s a concerted effort and a pre-meditated choice.

This choice is inherent in the rest of the game as well. You have to find the colossi, ride across an entire continent, and then figure out how to kill them. You have to want them to die. The game forces you to make decisions about whether or not to attack the colossi, a choice you have to make over and over, at each step of the way. Even when you’ve climbed the colossus, found his weak spot, you have to choose again — will you push O a second time and strike? Will you push O a last time and actually kill the colossus?

These moments can be incredibly poignant, and I would go as far as to say that Shadow of the Colossus is the only game in which “no” is an acceptable answer to those types of questions — all because of the way the controls are mapped.

When Shadow of the Colossus was released, some reviewers criticized it’s controls for being unresponsive or clumsy, especially in regards to Wander’s trusty steed, Agro. Treated like a traditional mount, Agro handles with all the grace and precision of a battery acid enema. Most vehicles are relatively straightforward: you get in, get around, and get off. Furthermore, cehicles are usually treated, thematically and mechanically, like extensions of the playable character — it’s really just a more efficient way to get from point A to point B.

Agro, on the other hand, has much subtler controls. Once you get him pointed in the right direction, just tap X a couple of times and let him do the rest. Agro makes turns, navigates obstacles, and generally keeps himself out of trouble, allowing Wander to enjoy the scenery and shoot arrows at birds, lizards, and the giant colossi that are trying to kill him. However, if you try to “steer” him , he just spazzes out.

Agro’s AI and his ability to take care of himself become crucial later in the game, as some colossi are impossible to beat without his help. By giving Agro the necessary for tools him to make decisions while Wander fights enemies, Shadow of the Colossus feels like a one-player co-op campaign. Wander fights the colossus, and his distinct, separate, intelligent partner Agro helps him out. In contrast to Wander’s controls, Agro’s purposefully put distance between horse and player, reinforcing his individuality and downplaying his function.

The implications of such freedom, and the dependence on Agro that the player develops, are far reaching and important. By creating several situations in which the player is dependent on Agro’s independence, Shadow of the Colossus forces you to develop emotional ties to him. This relationship (coerced or not) lends pathos to both Agro’s fall and his triumphant return.

This, in turn, ties into all sorts of overarching themes of the game: loneliness, isolation, and the nature of love and friendship. Granted, other elements in the game also contribute to these themes — the fact that Agro is the only character with a name, or the sprawling, sparse landscapes — but Wander and Agro’s relationship is, at its core, based on how Agro is controlled.

What’s happened here is that a really well-done gameplay mechanic (fighting the colossi with Agro’s help) has engendered and contributed to a very compelling artistic metaphor (friendship). What’s even more impressive is that said mechanic, and therefore said metaphor, is dependent on Agro’s control scheme. Just let that sink in for a second: the artistic merit of Shadow of the Colossus is inextricably linked to its control setup.

Given that most designers don’t seem to give a second thought to the way game characters are controlled (or, in Agro’s case, not controlled), this feat is particularly impressive and goes a long way in showcasing the artistry of Shadow of the Colossus and Team Ico’s vision.

Sacrificing intuitiveness or gameplay to make an artistic statement is obviously a risky move and a tough decision, but Fumito Ueda made his choice, for better or for worse. For Shadow of the Colossus, I am of the firm opinion that it was for better.

How I'm Recovering from Autistic Burnout

I've been experiencing autistic burnout, and today I wanted to talk about what I'm doing to recover. Recovering from burnout is a process and it takes different amounts of time for each person. I just wanted to share what I've personally been doing to feel better.